On the island of Malta, up the street from
the British Hotel, there's a garden of statues called Barracca.
It sits on the cliff overlooking the harbor. One of the American
women hiked up there Sunday while the others were in church. She
wanted to be alone. To think. To recover from the sting of
Matty's words. It hadn't really been a quarrel, just a firm
reminder.
She was the one who'd broken the rules. Matty
had been sticking to the plan. But things were somewhat off
balance. Askew. Regular customs and practices hadn't seemed to
apply. Maybe it was the sun bleached island in the
Mediterranean, the hot wind from Africa that moaned like the
Santa Anna's for the first two days and nights, the ancient
stone runes, temples of the goddess--Tarxien, Hagar Qim, and
Mnajdra--or the rotund stone figures of ancient women. Maybe it
was the archaeological focus of the group of women they traveled
with, the three witches from L.A., corn-fed, healthy looking
women, who shared meals and buses but otherwise kept to
themselves, the voices of the Italian women that floated up
through the balcony window from the sun bleached, stone streets
in the mornings, or the cats that screamed at night like women,
breeding and hunting in the narrow alleys below. She'd never
seen the sun so bright, glistening on the harbor like gold
lame--never missed diet soda and endless cups of coffee so much.
Here images seemed backward, turned inside out, like a photo
negative of possibilities, a picture where even the laws of
nature had changed.
At sunrise she'd sat on the balcony and watched
a pigeon roosting on the eaves, silhouetted against the blue and
coral sky. She remembered the previous afternoon of sex in the
primitive iron bed with squeaking springs. White sunlight had
streamed through the windows. Sex had been slow, gentle and
loving--without the desperation they felt in their limited time
together back home. She'd lingered over Matty's triangle.
Glistening black hairs as fine as silk. She'd pushed her tongue
to dark salty regions, caverns of pleasure previously
unexplored. Matty's fingers had left tingling trails of fire.
Her was touch hypnotic. Enthralling.
When they dressed for dinner she'd impulsively
pulled Matty to her and said, "Leave him."
After an uneasy silence, Matty spoke softly into
her shoulder, "You know I can't do that."
"We'll manage somehow."
"You left your husband for a woman, and she left
you . . . ." Matty's accusation had trailed off.
Their eyes met. The air in the room seemed heavy
and still. The woman dropped her arms and backed away nodding.
Of course, nothing here could change the certain realities. Not
even Malta.
The woman heard Matty stirring in the room
behind her. She realized the roosting pigeon was gone, and
wondered why she hadn't heard its flapping wings. She watched
the sun continue to rise over the ocean. Small fishing boats
made their way through the mouth of the harbor, moving slowly
from a safe haven to the open sea.
After awhile Matty said her name. The woman
turned. Matty was dressed in her best black pants. A scarf
covered her hair. "I'm going to church with the others. Are you
sure you won't come?"
"I need some time alone."
Matty nodded.
The woman walked up the hill toward the garden.
In front of the gate a black dog slept under a sign that said
"No dogs allowed." She took a picture. The paths were lined with
dry bushes and palm trees. A round fountain trickled at the
center. She looked out across the open sea to the place where it
met the misty sky, then turned back toward the Valetta. She
could see the hotel. Their room on the third floor, where a
towel was drying in the balcony window.
A noise startled her. Close. Shrill. Like a
woman's cry. She turned frantically. Saw nothing. The sound came
again. She looked down. Just off the dusty pathway, a gaunt,
gray cat under a dry bush nursed two small kittens. The cat
looked wild. Hungry. She saw then that the garden was full of
cats. Maybe the same ones she'd heard hunting beneath her
windows at night. She remembered the dog lying patiently by the
gate.
"You left your husband for a woman, and she left
you . . . ."
Here in this beautiful city, this place rich
with history and romance, there lived hundreds of starving cats.
The garden was alive with them, under bushes, beneath the
statues of the muses.
As the American woman strolled back toward the
hotel she thought about Matty and sighed. She had paid so much,
come so far, only to find this hunger.